Starting a conversation about mental health can feel overwhelming, but it matters more than you might think. Reaching out to someone who’s struggling shows them they’re not alone and that you genuinely care. How you support a friend could be the first step toward their healing journey.
Recognizing the Sign
Mental health struggles don’t always look the same. Here are a few signs your friend might be going through a tough time:
- Pulling away from friends, groups, or usual activities
- Sudden changes in mood, behavior, or communication
- Short temper, anxiety, or getting overwhelmed easily
- Low energy, sleep issues, or changes in appetite
- Negative self-talk, hopelessness, or risky behavior
- Difficulty concentrating or making decisions
These shifts could reflect internal stress or emotional pain they’re having trouble expressing.
How You Can Help
1. Listen Without Judgment
Sometimes, the best thing you can do is simply be there. Give your full attention and reassure your friend you’re here to listen. Let them talk at their own pace and avoid rushing or interrupting. You don’t have to fix anything, you just have to care.
2. Respect Their Space and Feelings
Self-expression can be hard when someone is struggling. Respect their choices and pace, so they don’t feel any judgement or pressured. Encourage your friend to explore other ways to express how they feel, like through journaling, drawing, or simply writing things down. Remind them their feelings are valid, and avoid making assumptions about what they’re going through.
3. Clarify Boundaries and Expectations
Ask your friend what support would be most helpful right now. Questions like, “What would feel supportive from me today?” can open the door to clearer communication. If something they ask makes you uncomfortable, it’s okay to say so. Be honest and offer what you can without making false promises.
4. Be a Steady Presence
How you support a friend doesn’t always look like deep conversations. Sometimes, it’s just showing up. Invite them to hang out like you usually would, go for a walk, watch a movie or just do something light together. Let them know your friendship hasn’t changed because they opened up to you.
5. Share Supportive Resources
You might want to help by sharing helpful tools, but don’t overload them. Instead, ask:
“Would it help if I sent you the contact for a therapist?”
“Want me to send you a few websites with support info?”
Offer resources gently, and let them decide what feels right.
6. Follow Up and Check In
A simple message or call can go a long way to support a friend. Regular check-ins show you’re still here for them, and following up on things you discussed helps them feel supported and seen. Celebrate any progress they make with their mental health, whether big or small.
Remember: You’re Not Their Therapist
It’s okay if you don’t have all the answers. Your role is to support and encourage, not to diagnose or fix. If things feel too heavy or complex, gently suggest connecting with a professional. You can book free therapy sessions at TIERs. You could say:
“I might not fully understand what you’re going through, but I care and I’m here. Maybe we could look into talking to a therapist together?”
Let’s Normalize Mental Health Conversations
After someone opens up, they might feel embarrassed, anxious or unsure. Reassure them through your actions like still just being yourself, and keep including them in your usual hangouts. If they need a gentler pace, ask what they’re comfortable with. The goal is to help them feel safe, not singled out.
Supporting someone else can be healing for you, too.
Let’s keep showing up for each other. Let’s normalize mental health conversations today and always. Let’s be our brother’s keeper.
